Movement & Music
April 27, 2012, 4:06 pm
Filed under: Dancing, Love & Relating, Spirituality | Tags: , , , ,

Creative Expression.  What does it mean to you?

My entire life I have been a dancer.  Moving in some form.  Which is interesting to me when I look back in my childhood I felt lazy (which is entirely different blog).  You can ask my best friend who has known me since I was a child, I was always moving.  In my living room, in my bedroom, in the shower… it  didn’t matter.  There was always a beat to dance to whatever noise was going on even if it was only me humming a tune.

Now that I’m a big, bad adult, creative expression has come and gone sometimes moment to moment and sometimes days to weeks.  I don’t envy those who rely on their creativity to make a living like a tattoo artist or something.  As a massage therapist, there are many creative aspects to my business and I most definitely delve into creative expression on a regular basis.

Today I woke up feeling inspired to tickle that area of my brain.  The best idea I’ve had all day was turn on music.  I know it’s silly but I sometimes forget that MUSIC is such a great way to tap in to the stream of creative energy.  Now I’m moving and feeling connected to others who feel inspired.

I remember the days when I had hours of “free time” to get lost in movement and music.  There is no feeling like it.  To put your feelings in a movement… is the deepest form of communication to another human.  A intentional glance with your eyes and flick of your hip along with tracing the floor with your toe.. says something very specific.

After dancing, my blood is moving and I’m breathing different.  I feel wrung out and a loving, tight squeeze from the Universe.  I feel alive!

GO! Move! Dance your little heart out!


My Mama.
September 9, 2011, 4:18 pm
Filed under: Love & Relating, Spirituality | Tags: , , , , ,

With all of the coverage on NPR about the 10th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks on the World Trade Center, I have stopped listening to 90.7 for the weekend.  Not because I’m against the coverage but because every time I hear a story, I end up crying!

I should preface this by saying, the whole 9/11 attacks have been fuzzy to me.  I didn’t know anyone in New York at the time. I still haven’t met anyone who had someone close to them die in the 9/11 event.  I remember sitting in Mrs. Pontious’ Geometry class when the planes hit and thinking, “Why are they showing us this weird movie? And why is the entire school stopping for this?”  It wasn’t until later that I realized the severity of the situation.  I mean, give me a break, I was in high school; I was way more worried about what everyone else was doing in school rather than the world.  I’m not against our country but I’m not super patriotic.  I’m not the kind of person you will find “Americana” decor in my kitchen or have American flag checks.  That’s just not me.  I do take a basic interest in politics and the policies the politicians create.  I also feel like I don’t really have a huge say in what happens so I’m not going to get really worked up if it doesn’t come out the way I had hoped.

Anyway. I heard this heart-wrenching story from a girl who lost her mom on the plan that hit the towers.  She now goes around the country telling her story to others.  Honestly, I don’t even remember her name.  She says her mom gave her this moral obligation to change the world through her story.  I think that’s beautiful but that’s not what made me cry.  She said on the 10th anniversary she will be spending the day on the countryside where her mom like to go out and “be with the day.”  Shortly after the attacks, she went out to that spot and she felt she could “feel” her mothers presence as there was no wind yet the ferns were moving.  That is also beautiful but did not make me cry.  (it’s interesting to me how so many people have these metaphysical, unexplained events and it’s totally acceptable when someone dies but that’s a whole other story we can get into later.)   She mentioned how it was hard to believe that she hadn’t spoke to her mom in 10 years.  This is what made me cry like a baby! I had put myself in her shoes at that moment and imagined my life without talking to my mom for 10 years! I jumped on the phone and told my mom I loved her and thanked her for being such a huge support in my life.

Through all of the crap my partner and I have been going through, I can tell she does her best to keep a calm, cool neutral approach.  How amazing is that? I mean, it’s so much easier to fly off the handle in an emotional rage (trust me, I’ve done it) than to take a few deep breathes and keep moving forward.  This may be easier for her because it’s not her situation but her support for me has been exceptional.

I really attribute my logic and roots to both of my parents.  As different as we all are, they are really great.  I’m so thankful and full of gratitude for their continued support through my life.  They don’t always take my side and do their best to give me the straight facts even though I may not want to hear it!  I appreciate the tough love.  They have taught me how to take care of myself, how to rely on myself, and how to trust myself. What a beautiful lesson in a world full of chaotic people.

The moral of the story: Hug your parents today!


Hello! Welcome to my brain on your computer screen.  This is dedicated to my  thoughts, my experiences, and my questions along the journey we call life.  I use writing as an outlet to express myself and work-out complex emotions and ideas that leave me feeling confused and/or elated.

I am a young woman.  I am a Massage Therapist.  I am a girlfriend.  I am a Step-Mom. I am a dancer.  I am a Spiritualist.

I like being outdoors. I like gardening & flowers.  I like listening to music.  I like learning and pondering about the future and the world.

I plan to use this space to write about love, relating, politics, spirituality, challenges, and what makes happy.  I want to share with the blogging world what really moves me into feeling alive all the way to what challenges my experience.

Disclaimer: If you read something that mildly or severely upsets you or something you may think is about you, do not dwell on it.  I write for me–not you. This is my therapy.  I welcome comments, feelings, and beliefs but I refuse to take responsibility for your emotions–that is your job.